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Cricket is a curious invention of the English, a game that takes five days to play and usually ends in a draw (Except of course if Australia are playing or the teams are badly mismatched e.g. if Australia is playing), great for loafers and others with time on their hands, a perfect occasion to sit in the sun, listen to the radio, read the paper and suck on a few beers.
OK they were only playing Bangladesh but we don't often get a test match in Dunedin these days. We couldn't have asked for a better day either as we soaked in the sun and the amber fluid was flowing. The University Oval became the 96th venue in test cricket. Don't ask me why they can't play them at Carisbrook any more, it's political..... It would also be an opportunity to see Jacob Oram at the crease and he didn't disappoint notching up his fourth test century in quick fashion. Mathew Bell also made a ton. The tail didn't really wag with just captain Daniel Vettori adding 32. Chris Martin coming in last was roundly applauded as he saw the fist delivery safely off, then as he scored his first run, then as growing in confidence he found the boundary, reaching double figures and then finally leaving the field with a test cricket high score of 12 runs not out.

New Zealand Vs Bangladesh, First Test, University Oval, Dunedin.
During the match Glenn and Greg Turner came and sat beside me as I perched on a window sill just by the sight screens. They are pretty close to sporting aristocracy in this country. Glenn Turner was the first player since WW2 to score 100 runs before May in England (Graeme Hick is the other), and is in good company with Don Bradman the only other players to do it as part of a touring side. Turner was something of a bad boy of NZ cricket and after falling out with administrators was unavailable for NZ selection for a number of years. During that time he concentrated on English county cricket, only returning to the international stage late in his career. He remains one of our best ever performers with a career average of 44.64 in tests and 47.0 in ODI. His brother Greg is a seasoned golf pro who has performed well on the Australasian and European golf tours. Another brother Brian, represented NZ in hockey and is an award winning author, poet and newspaper columnist.
No I didn't bother them, I'm sure they've had enough of cretins from the public. It is one thing I like about this country though, that sports stars (and others) can get about freely without being molested too much. I went to a game years ago when the Windies played Otago at Carisbrook. Curtly Ambrose and Courtney Walsh took a stroll on the terraces. The chicks were all over them of course, I suppose that level of molestation would be tolerable for them. I remember seeing Curtly at the MCG in 1995, the Boxing Day test. The "Collapso Calypsos" hadn't won a single match on tour, even going down to teams such as the Wallamagoogoo U13s second 11. Finally on the third day of the test Ambrose got it right and ripped through the Australian batting line up, the Windies scored the required runs and had the match sown up. 70,000 quiet Australians, a marvelous day.
The Bangladeshis returned to the field, their openers putting together an unbeaten 148 run partnership at around 5 runs per over as the kiwis failed to capitalise on their superior position. On day three they got it together though after breaking the opening stand at 161 (record for all wickets for the tourists) they dismissed the rest of the batting line up fairly cheaply to notch up a relatively easy win.
Can't wait til the poms get here......
Ben. C. Vidgen courtesy of Deadline Magazine
"If these writings of the Greek agree with the book of god, they
are useless and need not be preserved; if they disagree, they are
pernicious and ought to be destroyed"
- Calip Umar - the second
sacking of Alexandria 640 Ad (aprox).
"We had been serving a crab ice cream to accompany a risotto of
crab. I was interested in how the description of the ice cream made
a world of difference to the perception and acceptance of the ice
cream. Calling it crab ice cream creates a barrier for the taster
and
a level of sweetness that in reality is less perceived. The
response
however, when told that this is in fact frozen crab bisque, is
totally
different. The barrier comes down and the ice cream can be tasted
for what it is.
- Heston Blmenthal - The Fat Duck.
Andrew Spiegel of Sargood, Edgewater resort, Wanaka set
out to make tobacco infused ice cream, frustrated by smokers
leaving the table and "interrupting the flow of the table".
First he checked to see if there were any legal consequences.
There were so Spiegel, using pinot noir canes, and vanilla
pods and substitutes, created a tobacco "flavored" ice cream
instead. In theory this is where the story should have ended,
however Spiegel's ice cream then got "political". A fact I
found out when speaking to the Edgewater's management
who were unwilling to let me interview Spiegel. The
Edgewater's attitude followed protests from Action on
Smoking and Health spokesman Becky Freeman and
nutritionist Otago University Professor Mann. Normally I'm
loath to use the phrase 'political correctness gone mad', a
term generally used by card carrying members of the KK
pissed off at the fact that lynching "niggers" is no longer
considered an acceptable way to enjoy Friday night. In this
case the description is accurate, the for mentioned agents of
decency and good living representing different sides of the
same coins of intolerance and close mindedness as their own
words prove.
"I couldn't think of anything more disgusting than the
suggested idea that people need nicotine" replied Freeman.
How the anti-tobacco spokesperson, with the ironic
surname, formed the conclusion that tobacco flavored ice
cream could brainwash people into then buying cigarettes
continues to baffle me (and makes me slightly curious
as to the exact content of her freezer). Yet Becky is right
nicotine is disgusting, now having said that run an (unlit)
Macanudo cigar under our nose. Personally the tobacco of
these Jamaican beauties conjures up images of brown sugar,
Turkish coffee, and Russian fudge.
"A ridiculous gimmick" intoned Mann "this is taking a not
particularly healthy food and adding another inappropriate
component" (you just know Christmas dinner at the Mann
household's a bunch of fun don't you). In the effort to
pursue personal crusades the two are guilty of smashing
square pegs into round holes, and in the process they have
, so I believe (not been able to interview Spiegel we will
never know for sure) missed the real point behind Spiegel's
tobacco flavoured ice cream. The ability to isolate and then
engineer flavours, to bring the good out of the ugly, is for a
chef essential; careers live or die upon this form of alchemy.
A point underlined by Chef Heston Blumenthal, owner of
the Fat Duck (www.fatduck.co.uk), a three Michelin star
restaurant, consistently ranked as being one of the top three
establishments in the world by any guide you care to name.
In July 2005 Blumenthal was awarded an honorary doctorate
from Reading University for his work into isolating flavors.
Blumenthal's research, using chemists and psychologists,
ranges from detecting disease by smell to rekindling faded
palates (as suffered by the elderly and long term smokers).
Becky and Mann could have learned a thing or two had
they taken the opportunity from Spiegel in relation to the
science of gastronomy, which as Blumenthal reveals has
implications that should be of interest to anyone involved in
nutrition or smoking related health issues. Instead acting like
Jim the Eagle ("under all that fur they're naked you know")
the two chose to soap box denounce that which they did not
understand while hindering those who wanted to learn. All of
which proves yet again that inflexible dogmas are clearly as
dangerous and unpalatable as nicotine will ever be.
Deadline: January 26, 2006
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